Wow! I can't believe I've finally got this monster posted. It is the first story I've ever written (outside of school courses) and it took me forever to finish it.
I have to thank Sue Pokorny for giving me invaluable help and being my Beta. She definitely helped fine tune this story. I also have to thank EJKatz who encouraged me practically from the beginning to keep writing when I wanted to give up.
This story would not have made it without their help.
Unfortunately, I don't own them. They belong to Pet Fly and Paramount. No copyright infringement is intended.
The story itself belongs to me and permission is given to Wolfpup's Den to archive.
Rating: R. Violence, angst and maybe a little tiny bit of mildly coarse language.
Feedback is always welcome: paulineanderson@nf.sympatico.ca
About Me: My name is Pauline and I am a 31 year old first time writer. I am definitely not a writer, but really wanted to get my own version of how I wanted 'The Sentinel' to proceed after the finale. Even though it was a lot of work, I really enjoyed the process of writing this story and I hope people enjoy reading it.
Pauline A.
CHAPTER ONE
9:00 am -- Somewhere in Cascade
Mitchell Strand wanted to reach across the seat of his Ford truck and slap the grin off his cousin's face. The kid was getting more annoying as each day passed. Here he was trying to put his plan into play and the idiot he was cursed to be related to, was repeatedly tapping his hands on his legs to a beat only he could hear, and was now telling him to 'chill out and relax Cuz, everything's gonna be OK'. The only reason Freddy was even involved was because the sneak eavesdroped on him and the guys as they were making their plans.
Strand was an ex-con who was just fed up with not getting what he wanted. He thought that after the life he had, he should have everything handed to him on a silver platter. He got out of the 'joint' five months ago and against his better judgement, tried to lead an 'honest' life but it just wasn't for him. He couldn't stand sucking up to anyone and if he had to be pleasant to one more idiot just because he happened to be his boss, he would go insane. He should have known not to expect much, after all he was born to an alcoholic mother who drank herself to death when he was four, and a father who decided that he'd use Mitchell for batting practice. After leaving home (if that's what you could even call it) at the age of thirteen, he lived on the street and joined a street gang called the 'Spades'. It was only at that point that life began for him. The Spades were his family and they took care of each other.
He'd been in and out of 'juvie' for small crimes like shoplifting and petty theft. As the years went by, the crimes began to get bigger and more elaborate as he started using his head and planning his crimes more carefully so that he wouldn't be caught. He had been successful at it until eight years ago.
It was a stupid mistake when he thought back on it. He let his emotions get the better of him and that is what got him in trouble. He fell for a girl that turned on him and squealed to the cops. That little mistake cost him seven years of his life in jail. One of the first 'crimes' he planned while still in the joint was her death. If he waited until he got out, he would no doubt be the main suspect, so through a member of the Spades, the plan was set in motion and the poor girl was killed in a horrible accident. The police had suspicions about the death, but there was no evidence of foul play at the scene. The girl's blood alcohol level came back three times the legal limit and everything pointed to an accident while driving under the influence.
Strand came up for parole eight months later and since he had been the 'model' prisoner, and she wasn't there to make a protest like she had when his parole came up the year before, he had been granted parole and released into society.
Now he was back to his old life and loving every minute of it. This hit would be his last and should provide enough of a payoff to last him and the guys their entire lives on some tropical island filled with lovely, scantily clad ladies. This time, only the Spades knew the plan, well the Spades and Freddy. The members of the Spades were the only people he trusted. Freddy was a liability who would need to be disposed of as soon as he was no longer needed.
The last details were being put in place. He just had to wait a few more hours, then he could get rid of the annoying burden sitting just a few feet away from him in his truck. He wasn't leaving any witnesses this time, he learned that the hard way, and he just couldn't trust his 'dear' cousin.
Strand nodded as everything came together in his head. His plan was going into action tomorrow and before the day ended, the last obstacle would be out of the picture. He looked over at his cousin and slipped a grin on his face.
"Yeah Freddy," he responded to his cousin. "Everything's going to work out just fine." He popped another one of those 'natural sugar' candies he loved into his mouth as he continued to drive down the street. Yeah, everything will be fine in just a few more hours, he thought to himself.
Several hours later
Jim Ellison took a deep breath as he pulled his truck up in front of the crime scene. He'd just met his father for lunch when Simon called requesting him at a crime scene, a murder scene.
His father had wanted to discuss Jim's senses a little more. At times it seemed like William wanted to tell him something that concerned his senses, but whatever he was holding back he had yet to reveal to Jim. William insisted that he wanted to continue their conversation as soon as possible, so Jim unhooked a spare loft key off his keychain and made arrangements to meet his father there in a few hours. With Blair at the Academy, William could wait in peace.
When Jim stepped into the house, he was met with a gruesome scene. The victim's body was lying in the living room, surrounded by a pool of drying blood. The man's hands were both missing and massive bruising was evident on the exposed skin.
Captain Simon Banks broke away from the officer he was speaking with and joined his best detective who was kneeling beside the body.
"Jim," Simon said as he squatted down next to Jim.
Ellison looked at his captain. "What's the story here, Sir?"
"That's what we were hoping you might be able to tell us." Simon nodded towards the opposite end of the room where paramedics had just finished administering something to a distraught young woman. "The young lady over there came to see her boyfriend and this is what greeted her when she walked in. The neighbours called in when they heard hysterical screaming coming from this place. When the officers arrived, they found the door open and the body right here." He glanced at the girl in sympathy. "She was curled up in the corner still screaming. The paramedics got her calmed down only a few minutes ago."
Jim glanced at the girl before turning back to run his enhanced eyesight over the corpse. "Yeah, well, anyone would freak out if they saw their loved one like this."
Simon looked closely at Jim and when he realized that Jim was using his senses, he placed a hand on Jim's shoulder to ground him.
Jim finished looking over the corpse and suddenly realized there was a warm hand on his shoulder. He glanced over at his captain and friend with a small grin on his face.
"Been taking lessons from Sandburg, Sir?" Jim teased his captain.
"Yeah, well I just didn't want to have your partner tearing into me if I had to call him out of the Academy to bring you out of a zone," Simon responded grumpily.
"Why were we called in instead of Homicide?" Jim questioned as he glanced around the room.
Simon sighed and gave a slight shrug of his shoulders. "Seems half of Homicide is out due to the food poisoning from Clancy's retirement party last night, so we're picking up the slack."
Jim nodded and turned back to the body. "Lucky us."
"Did you find anything Jim?" a voice spoke up behind them. Jim was startled at the unexpected voice, having not heard the person come up behind him. He turned around to see Detective Brian Rafe standing behind him. "I mean with your senses, you know?" Rafe finished.
"I don't know, Rafe," Jim replied in confusion as his heartbeat settled back into its normal rhythm. He looked back at the body. "I don't see anything out of the ordinary, but there's a smell. It's something I can't quite place." Jim paused as he screwed up his face. "It's not any kind of aftershave or anything like that. I'm not sure what it is, but it smells sweet. I've never smelled anything like it before."
Jim slowly walked over towards the kitchen where he could also smell the faint scent. It was coming to him from two different directions. As he passed by the counter he spotted a candy wrapper rumpled up on it. He called out for an evidence bag, gently picked up the paper with his latex gloved hand and put the paper into the bag, handing it off to a cop for evidence gathering. He then walked over to the body to do another 'scan'.
As he knelt next to the body, he reached out with his sense of smell, trying to pinpoint the scent he had smelled on the paper wrapper. It was on the body, he just had to narrow it down to where. "The smell that's on the body is also on that wrapper we just bagged." Jim glanced around in confusion. "If the smell is from whatever was in that wrapper then someone else was eating them because the smell is definitely not coming from the victim's mouth." He looked up at Rafe to see him nodding his head. It was still a little strange when he remembered that the gang from Major Crime knew about his senses.
After the mess with the dissertation and Zeller had calmed down, Jim and Blair decided to let their friends in on 'the secret'. After all, they were their friends and they all stood by them through a lot over the past few years. He knew they all suspected there was something more going on regarding Jim and his partner and none of them believed that Blair was a fraud or that he would lie about his work, it just wasn't the Blair they all knew.
Blair also wanted the MC Gang to know about Jim's senses because he wanted Jim to have the proper back-up while he was at the Academy. He wouldn't be there to keep him from zoning, or to pull him out of a zone, so it was decided by Jim and Blair, with added support from Simon, to let their closes friends and co-workers in on the whole story. Many at the PD suspected there was something to Blair's dissertation, but only the MC Gang, as well as Serena Chang and Dan Wolf, knew the extent.
Several weeks earlier:
Jim and Blair walked out of the kitchen carrying the drinks into the living room for the crowd that congregated there at their request. Joel, Simon, Megan, Henri, Rafe, Rhonda, Serena and Dan had all accepted the invitation to the loft when Blair had asked them earlier that afternoon.
Both Jim and Blair were pretty nervous about this meeting. They had decided to tell their co-workers the truth about Jim's abilities. They didn't know whether to expect shock, anger, understanding, disgust, fear or rejection. The last few being their biggest fear.
After everyone had their drinks in hand, Blair sat down in the chair next to the balcony and Jim stood behind him, leaning on the back of Blair's chair. Jim placed a hand on Blair's shoulder in silent question and Blair answered by reaching up and squeezing the hand, signalling to Jim that he was OK.
Blair took a deep breath and opened his mouth to start the explanation, but before he could start he was interrupted.
"It's true."
It was more of a statement than a question and it came from Henri, Joel, Rafe and Serena all at the same time. Jim and Blair were shocked into silence.
Joel Taggart looked at each of the guests assembled for encouragement. Each one nodded at him to continue, so he looked up at Jim and said what they all knew was true. "The Sentinel thing is true. Jim is a Sentinel," he looked over at Blair and continued, "and you help him with it." Everyone in the room focussed on Blair. "Sort of like a guide or something."
Blair started to panic at this turn of events. His first instinct was to deny it and protect Jim, that is until his mind caught up with him and he remembered that the reason for everyone being here was to tell them the truth.
Henri started to laugh after a few seconds. "I can't believe Hairboy is actually speechless." Everyone in the room laughed at this and it helped Jim and Blair to relax a little.
"It's alright guys," Rafe explained. "We know the truth about Jim's senses. We wouldn't be able to call ourselves detectives if we didn't see the clues all around us." Everyone nodded in agreement.
Blair glanced over his shoulder at Jim and they both let out a breath of relief. As soon as he trusted himself to speak again, he turned back to their group of friends. "We weren't quite sure how you guys were going to take this."
"There was no way we were going to believe Blair was a fraud," Joel smiled apologetically as Blair visibly flinched at the term 'fraud'. "You're too honest to even think about anything like that, Blair, and we all know it. We've never met a more honourable, courageous and supportive person and we are all proud to call you our friend." Joel reached over and squeezed Blair's hand. Everyone nodded their agreement and Blair had to lower his head to hide the sudden appearance of moisture in his eyes. Jim grasped Blair's shoulders with his hands and lowered his head until his forehead rested atop Blair's curly hair.
"I should have known this couldn't have been hidden from my detectives for very long," Simon spoke up with pride.
"OK now," Henri started. "We've known for some time that something was going on with Jim and Blair, and we suspected that the Captain was in on whatever it was."
"Yeah, H, you're right," Jim went on to explain about the onset of his senses and what he was going through before he met Blair, then Blair jumped in to explain what a Sentinel was exactly and went on to describe the dangers to a Sentinel and what his role was in the partnership. They admitted that Simon had known from the beginning and that Megan had accidentally found out after the 'Barnes' incident. Everything about Sentinels and Guides was explained to the group of friends, even touching a little (very little) on the spiritual side of it (the Spirit Guides and Blair being a Shaman, passed on to him by Incacha).
Everyone took in the information and several of them asked questions about Jim's abilities and Blair's responsibilities. Then they all started pointing out circumstances in the past that they had no explanations for at the time, but did now.
"That's what you meant at the fountain when you asked Jim if he heard Blair's heartbeat?" Rafe asked Simon. Simon nodded his head in answer.
"That's also how you can practically do my job without even using the equipment!" Serena Chang, the forensic specialist exclaimed.
"Jim is like a walking forensic laboratory," Blair responded with enthusiasm and continued explaining all the different ways Jim was able to use his senses to speed investigations and reach conclusions so fast that normally wouldn't be reached without the senses. Everyone listened in awe at Blair's commentary and as the night came to a close everyone agreed to keep Jim's abilities a secret and to protect the Sentinel and Guide any way they could.
Present time:
Jim was brought back to the present when Serena Chang arrived and knelt next to Jim. "Not doing my job again are you Jim," she whispered with a smile on her face.
"Trying not to, Serena," Jim leaned over to her and continued in a whisper. "My guide doesn't like it when I show off in front of the professionals." He smirked as Serena swatted him on the arm, then stood up and glanced around to see who was within earshot. As the detectives, captain and forensics officer huddled together, Jim explained the scent he had smelled on the body to Serena. "I couldn't see anything on him. No hair or prints anywhere. The only thing I found was the smell. I think it might be on his skin somewhere around his face or neck but it doesn't smell like something that's supposed to be on skin."
"OK, Jim," Serena nodded thoughtfully. "It's not that I don't believe you, but I still have to go through all the normal procedures. I don't know if I will be able to come up with anything on the smell, but I'll definitely give it my best."
"Never expected anything less." Jim patted Serena on the arm and followed Simon away from the body. As Simon kept a grounding hand on Jim's arm, Jim made a brief scan of the room with his senses, but could find no other clues.
"I can't wait until Sandburg finishes at the academy and can get back to this guiding thing," Simon complained. "I don't know how the kid does it. He makes it look so easy, Jim, but it's not. It just looks so natural for him and if truth be told, I don't have a clue what I'm doing."
"You're doing just fine Simon," Jim answered his captain. "You're not Blair, but then again nobody's like Blair." The comment brought a chuckle from both men. "In just a couple of months you'll be able to retire your 'temporary guide' title."
"Thank you, God," Simon exclaimed. He looked around at the scene then back at Jim. "I guess there's not much left to do here now. The uniforms are doing a house-to-house trying to find out if anyone saw or heard anything. Forensics have taken over the scene." He looked over at Jim as an evil thought popped into his head. "You can go back to your daddy now, Jim."
Jim's head twisted around to face Simon so quickly, he thought the detective would have whiplash. When he saw the ghastly look on his detective's face he had to quickly turn away from Jim as he burst out laughing. He placed his hands in front of him to ward off his detective's ire. "Just kidding Jim, relax will you. I couldn't let that opportunity pass."
Jim glared at his captain, then rolled his eyes. "Well if you'll excuse me, 'Captain', I have someone waiting for me." Jim punched his friend in the arm to let him know that he understood that it was just a joke and started to walk out of the house. "See you later, Simon."
"Later, Jim," Simon called out as Jim walked out the door towards his truck. Simon exited the house as well and headed toward his own vehicle parked on the street. "Wish I had someone waiting for me at home," he said wistfully. "Someone preferably of the female persuasion." He let out a laugh and shook his head as he reached his car and got in.
Naomi Sandburg grinned as she thought of Blair and Jim's reaction when they would open the loft door to see her sitting on the couch in the living room. They didn't know that she had a key to the loft, which she had made by borrowing Blair's key during her second visit to her son after he moved in with Jim Ellison. At first she'd been sceptical about the detective. After all, he was a cop and she'd had plenty of bad experiences with cops in her protesting days, which weren't exactly behind her since she'd sat in on a protest against animal testing just last month with a bunch of friends.
Her excitement grew as she approached 852 Prospect Avenue. This was her first visit to Jim and Blair since she'd left after the 'Dissertation Fiasco' three months ago. She had spoken to Blair several times since then, even had several long conversations with Jim those times she had called and Blair had not been home. She'd been afraid that her relationship with her son would be strained after what she'd done with his dissertation, but she should have known her loving and forgiving son wouldn't hold a grudge, especially against his only family -- well, blood family anyway. She knew Blair considered Jim part of his family, like a big brother and she had to laugh when she thought of Jim being her 'adopted' son! She did care a great deal about Jim and considered him family as well, even though, as far as she was concerned, she was way too young to be his 'mother'.
She started making plans for her stay in Cascade as she entered the complex where her son lived and made her way up the stairs to the third floor apartment. She was wondering if she had enough time to meditate before the boys got home. Blair had started at the Academy three weeks ago and only had another twelve weeks to go before he became an official police officer. She still had mixed feelings about her baby boy becoming a pig -- er, cop -- but it was Blair's decision, she reminded herself countless times, and if he was happy, that was all that really mattered.
As she entered apartment number 307, she took a quick glance around to see what, if anything, had changed since her last visit. There were a few noticeable changes as she looked around the place. Blair's books were absent from the coffee table. Each time she had visited her son in the past, there had always been school books on the coffee table, but since Blair was no longer at the University, there was no need for school books to be lying around. That brought a little sadness to her heart. Her little boy was all grown up and working towards achieving a profession he loved and one he was good at, even if it wasn't her first choice for him.
She walked over to the couch and sat down, picking up an Anthropology magazine on the coffee table to glance through while she waited. She nearly jumped out of her skin when she heard the toilet flush, then a few seconds later the bathroom door opened and an older man walked out, stopping on the spot when he spotted her.
Both froze where they were, unable to speak for a moment and just stared at each other. Their expressions changed from 'surprised' to 'confused' and finally to one of recognition and shock.
"Nona?" William Ellison gasped when he finally was able to make his voice work.
Naomi looked at him in confusion at first until suddenly her face burst into a look of shock and fear. "Billy?" Her voice shook slightly with trepidation.
"Oh my, God," William responded in shock as he finally confirmed that the woman before him was his Nona. "I can't believe it. What... where have... what are you doing here?" he managed to stutter.
Naomi started to panic and as she looked over towards the front door, the only exit available since the back door was behind 'Billy', but William slowly placed himself in a position that put him in between her and both exits.
"How did you find me?" she demanded. "Couldn't you have just left me alone and gone on with life with your family?"
William recoiled at the hatred expressed in Naomi's tone.
"You didn't really expect me to just forget about you did you?" William asked. "I spent years looking for you. Searching all over the country for you. I wanted to be with you for the rest of my life Nona. I loved you!"
"How can you say that when the whole time we were together was a lie," she demanded. "You made me believe we had a future together. I gave you my heart and you broke it. How could you tell me you loved me while the whole time you had a wife and children waiting at home for you in another city."
"I tried to tell you that night that it was over between me and Grace, but you wouldn't calm down enough to listen to me. I wanted to tell you that I was going to ask Grace for a divorce when I went back. I wanted to be with you and only you, but you wouldn't listen to me." William held out a hand, pleading with her to listen.
"Why would I listen to more lies from you?" Naomi backed away, her face hardening as she stared at him defiantly. "I didn't know if anything you told me that summer was true or not. I let all my defences down when you came into my life. I fell fast and I fell hard, but I never let that happen to me ever again after that. I made sure that no man would ever tear my heart apart like you did, Billy."
"I'm so sorry, Nona," William responded taking a step towards Naomi. "I never meant to hurt you."
Naomi took another step away from William and stretched her arm out in front of her, signalling William to stop. "Don't come near me Billy, please."
William froze where he was. He was in an absolute state of shock. He had spent years looking for Nona. He'd come so close to finding her several times, only to have her slip through his fingers each and every time. He had finally given up looking after a decade of searching.
William thought back to that time when his life with Grace had become unbearable. Grace's 'episodes' were occurring more and more and their relationship had deteriorated to the point where all they did in each other's presence was fight about anything and everything. It had been an awful, depressing time for William Ellison until he'd gone to San Francisco on a business trip in 1968 and met a beautiful, young, energetic angel protesting in the park. He had been immediately drawn to her and suddenly he had to meet this amazing person.
1968, San Francisco:
He introduced himself as 'Billy Ellis' and proceeded to spend practically every available moment of the rest of that week with this beautiful woman introduced to him as 'Nona Saunders'. He was physically drawn to this wonderful woman. He felt a serenity whenever he was near her that he had never felt before in his entire life. It was as if he was truly alive for the first time in his life.
When he flew back to Cascade at the end of the week, Nona was all he could think about, so he arranged to take a secret 'leave of absence' from the office and began arranging another 'business' trip to San Francisco, or at least that is what he told Grace. This 'business' trip would be for a longer period of time and he explained to Grace that it was very delicate negotiating so it could take several weeks to iron out the details. Grace wasn't very broken up about his extended absence, he figured she would be glad to have him gone for a while since they hadn't been getting along for several months now.
He went on his 'trip' to San Francisco, met up with Nona and spent every moment of the next four weeks with her. He had never felt more free and loved in his life. But the time inevitably came that he had to return home to Grace and the boys. He and Nona parted and he told Nona that he would be back again in a few weeks. He went back to Cascade, already trying to come up with a way to get back to San Francisco to be with Nona. He was only back in Cascade a few hours when everything was blown to hell. He greeted Grace with a kiss on the cheek and hugged Jimmy and Stevie telling them how much he missed him. After the boys went upstairs to get ready for dinner, Grace turned on William and asked him how stupid he thought she was. She tore into him about how she could smell her on him and that if he wanted to keep the boys in his life, he better dump the 'tramp' and forget she existed. William was shocked at this outburst, especially since fidelity wasn't one of Grace's strongest values.
It lead to a horrible screaming match between the two of them that continued as the boys slowly walked downstairs with frightened looks on their faces. Grace was absolutely out of control at that point. She had been having 'fits' for the past year and their frequency had been increasing as the year progressed. It was like she had finally snapped and she lashed out at the first thing that she came into contact with, which unfortunately, were Jimmy and Stevie. William had to pry her away from the boys, fearing for their safety and for Grace's sanity.
William brought Grace to a nearby hospital for tests to find out what was causing her odd behaviour, but whatever it was, he knew he couldn't abandon the mother of his children when she was in such a condition. Several weeks later, he flew back to San Francisco to see Nona and explain to her how he couldn't see her for a while, at least until they found out what was happening to Grace. He still didn't know how much he was going to tell Nona when she opened the door of the apartment and her face lit up when she saw him. She pulled him into her arms and hugged him to her as if her life depended on it.
William's heart almost broke with the burden of what he was about to do to this wonderful person. If he told her the truth, would he lose her trust and her love forever? If he lied to her, would he ever be able to look into her eyes again without feeling like he betrayed her?
He listened as she said how happy she was that he was back, how she had some wonderful news for him and that everything was going to be perfect. That they would have a wonderful life together with their child.
Child!
William couldn't have heard her properly. As he pulled away from her she went on talking about how wonderful it was that they were going to have a baby. That they would raise him or her with love and nurture the spirit, teaching him or her to live life with a free spirit.
That was when he lost control of his brain and blurted out that he was married and had two small boys at home where his wife was in a hospital waiting for him.
The look on Nona's face was one of absolute devastation. There were several minutes of complete silence as both digested the news they had just been given. Suddenly Nona pushed William out her apartment door pleading for him to 'go away'. William stood outside the apartment for half an hour trying to figure out what to do, what to say to her to make things better, but he was so tired from dealing with the hospital and then travelling to San Francisco so suddenly, that he couldn't think straight. He made his way to a nearby hotel. He had a lot to think about. He'd try to figure things out tonight and come back the next morning and sort things out with Nona.
When he arrived at Nona's apartment the next morning, she didn't answer the door after he pounded on it for ten minutes. Finally, Nona's next door neighbour, who happened to be the landlord, came out yelling at him to go away, that 'the girl' was gone.
When William asked what she meant by gone, the woman replied that Nona had packed up her few belongings during the night and informed her that she was leaving. She left no forwarding address and told her she would not be returning.
William was devastated. How could she leave like that without talking to him. My God, she said she was pregnant with his child and then disappeared. What about the child, who would take care of it, who would provide for her and the child.
William spent the next ten years searching for Nona and their child. A search that never produced any results for the heartbroken man, who as time passed, allowed his heart to harden to the world around him.
Present time:
All those years of searching for her and suddenly here she was, right in front of him and he didn't have a clue what to say to her. She believed that he had lied to her, that he never cared about her, but nothing could be further from the truth. He had loved her so much, still loved her, though he was angry at the way she left, he still loved her.
She stood before him looking like a frightened deer about to flee at the slightest sound or movement. He had to get through to her. He had to make sure she knew how he felt about her back then, how he still felt about her now.
"Nona," he whispered. "Please, listen to me for just a minute. I did love you Nona. I have loved you every day since then."
"What about your wife?" Naomi demanded of him. "Were you tired of her and decided you wanted a new one? How long before you would have done the same thing to me?"
"No!" William shouted at her. "What I felt for Grace was completely different from what I felt for you. I cared about Grace, but I never did love her. I loved you, Nona. I have never loved anyone like I loved you. We could have worked things out. We could have been together, raised our child together, been a family."
"You already had a family," she threw back at him. "A family I knew nothing about!"
Jim pulled his truck into his parking space in front of the loft. It had been a long day and he just wanted to relax until he realized that his father was probably at the loft waiting for him. He knew that his father was only interested in learning more about his senses since William was only aware of the basics so far. They had managed to explain the whole Sentinel thing to the MC gang. He supposed he owed his own father the same courtesy. He only hoped to get the same support.
Things were getting better between himself and the old man, mostly thanks to Blair who always encouraged Jim to accept whenever his father reached out to him. There was still a tension between them, a distance that Jim wasn't sure they could ever cross. They would never have the father/son relationship that he had always seen on TV, but at least they were talking to each other now.
Jim made his way into 852 Prospect and took the elevator up to the loft on the third floor.
As he approached the door to the apartment he reached out with his hearing to see if his father was still there. He told his father he could wait for him in the loft and he would be back as soon as he could. As he focused his hearing he picked up two rapid heartbeats. One he knew as his father's, the other was... he automatically turned up his sense of smell until the scent of sage struck him and he sneezed.
Naomi!
As he paused outside of the door in an attempt to stop the oncoming barrage of sneezing, he managed to cue into the conversation inside the loft -- if you could call it a conversation. The voices were quickly escalating into a screaming match almost like the ones his mother and father used to have before she left.
"...You made me believe we had a future together. I gave you my heart and you broke it. How could you tell me you loved me while the whole time you had a wife and children waiting at home for you in another city."
"I wanted to tell you that night that it was over between me and Grace, but you wouldn't calm down enough to listen to me. I wanted to tell you that I was going to ask Grace for a divorce when I got back. I wanted to be with you and only you, but you wouldn't listen to me."
"Why would I listen to more lies from you I didn't know if anything you told me that summer was true or not. I let all my defences down when you came into my life. I fell fast and I fell hard, but I never let that happen to me ever again after that. I made sure that no man would ever tear my heart apart like you did Billy."
"I'm so sorry Nona...I never meant to hurt you."
What the hell was going on in there? Jim felt like he had just stepped into the Twilight Zone! His father knew Blair's mom from before. Why didn't his father tell him he knew Blair and his mother, why didn't Blair tell him that his father knew them!
Jim felt anger flicker inside him and he moved another step closer to the door, listening carefully.
"I cared about Grace, but I never did love her. I loved you Nona. I have never loved anyone like I loved you. We could have worked things out. We could have been together, raised our child together, been a family."
"You already had a family," she snarled back at him. "A family I knew nothing about!"
Jim let out a startled gasp as he realized what was going on inside his home. His father... Naomi... their child... BLAIR!!!!!
"I didn't purposely set out to deceive you, Nona," William tried to defend himself. "My marriage was already over, I just hadn't faced that fact until you came into my life."
Naomi rolled her eyes at William and opened her mouth to respond but William quickly closed the distance between them, grasped her by her arms in a firm grip and stared into her eyes with a look of determination.
"I've been wanting to explain all this to you for 30 years, Nona, and you are going to listen to me because you are not leaving this room until I've had my say." When Naomi didn't immediately respond, William continued. "First of all, I have always loved you, Nona. I have never stopped loving you. I know I hurt you by deceiving you about Grace and the boys that day. I know I should have told you about my life here in Cascade, but after spending time with you that first day, I didn't want it to end. If you had known I was married, you would have ended things right then and I didn't want that to happen. I was falling in love with you!"
Naomi pulled out of William's grasp and turned her back to him trying to hide her watering eyes.
"You were my world, Billy," Naomi stated. "You were the 'love of my life'. You were the first, and only man I have ever considered settling down with. I could actually imagine us married, raising our two or three children. I thought you were a person I could grow old with and I could actually picture you bouncing our grandchildren on your knee. I never wanted that with anyone else, not before you and especially not after you. I was not going to let myself get hurt like that again." Naomi lowered her head as a tear slipped down her cheek.
William stepped up behind her and gently laid his hands on her shoulders.
"I am so sorry, Nona." He let the pain he was feeling come through in his voice. "Hurting you was something I never wanted to do. I handled everything wrong back then, but please don't think that my loving you was ever wrong or a mistake because loving you was one of the best things that ever happened to me."
Naomi unconsciously leaned back into his touch and taking that as a positive sign, William leaned his head forward until his forehead rested on the top of Naomi's head.
"Please, Nona," he pleaded. "Please tell me that we can work through this. God help me, but I still love you. I feel the same now as I did then and I don't want you to walk out of my life after I've finally found you. I want us to be together, I have always wanted us to be together. Can't we try to get past this?"
"I don't know, Billy," Naomi responded. "I don't know if I can open my heart to you now like I did then. So much has happened in my life. I have had other relationships, but I have never allowed my heart to love again after what you did. I learned to 'detach with love' before it could be taken from me. The only person I kept in my heart was Blair."
"Blair?" William asked suddenly confused. Surely she couldn't mean...
"Yes, Blair," Naomi responded. "Our son."
William backed away from her as his mind fully grasped what she was saying. He was at Jimmy's place. Jimmy and Blair's place. Blair!
"Blair Sandburg?"
"Yes," Naomi answered, looking confused at William's response. "Blair lives here. I thought that was why you were here, that you had found Blair and you were here to see him!"
William couldn't speak for a few moments as the enormity of what Naomi just said crashed in on him. Blair Sandburg was his son! His and Nona's son! The son he'd been looking for was right here for the past four years living with his other son! William stumbled back a few steps until the back of his legs hit the couch and he collapsed onto it.
Blair!
His son!
Naomi moved over to sit beside him on the couch, reaching out and touching William's arm gently. "Billy!" she exclaimed. "Are you alright? What's wrong?"
Jim stood outside the loft frozen as he listened to Naomi and William's conversation inside the loft. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Naomi and William had been lovers when his parents were still married! William was Blair's father! Blair was his brother! Jim's head was spinning and he placed his hand against the door to steady himself. Suddenly he heard a loud gasp and his father's heartbeat suddenly became erratic.
Jim quickly pushed open the door and rushed to his father's side. William was pale, his eyes slightly unfocussed and was taking short quick breaths. Jim feared he was having a heart attack!
"Jim!" Naomi moved aside as Jim rushed over to the couch.
"Dad!" Jim crouched down in front of his father. "Dad, it's Jim, can you hear me?" Jim placed his hands on either side of his father's face and turned William's face towards him. "Dad?" Jim repeated.
"Jimmy?" William voice was soft and thready. "Can't breath."
"I thing he's having a panic attack, Jim," Naomi stated. "I've seen Blair have them."
Jim quickly nodded his agreement and gently forced his father to bend forward until his head was between his knees. He gently rubbed William's back, softly telling him to relax and breathe easily. After a few minutes, William's breathing evened out and his heartbeat steadied. It was still elevated but not to a dangerous level like before. William reached up and grabbed onto Jim's arm as he raised himself back into a sitting position and leaned heavily back against the cushion of the sofa.
"I'm OK, son."
Jim took a deep breath to get himself under control then looked over at Naomi. She was kneeling down beside him looking at William with concern. It was at that point that he saw a look come over her face. The look of someone finally putting some pieces of the puzzle together. She turned to Jim and looked at him in shock.
"Dad!" she exclaimed. "Jim, you called him 'Dad'?"
Jim took a moment to glance over at his father and gently rub the older man's back.
"Yes, Naomi," Jim replied, turning to look at her. "This is my father, William Ellison." He then looked over at his father and continued "Dad, this is Naomi Sandburg, Blair's mother."
Both William and Naomi looked at Jim. After a moment William reached out to Jim, laying his hand on Jim's arm.
"Son, how much did you hear?" William asked.
Naomi dropped her eyes to the ground, knowing full well Jim's sensitive hearing could have picked up their conversation from the parking lot.
"I heard pretty much all of it, Dad." Jim responded. Jim slowly got back to his feet and walked over to the patio doors, looking out over his city. Why did it suddenly feel so much smaller?
CHAPTER TWO
Blair Sandburg laughed to himself as he thought about his life. Here he was on the firing range at the police academy. He was wearing the cadet uniform, well the exercise uniform anyway, and he was shooting a gun and actually hitting the targets. God how his life has changed drastically in the last four years.
Four years ago he was an energetic student searching for, and never really expecting to find, a true Sentinel -- an extraordinary man with five heightened senses, a tribal guardian! He had been fascinated with Sentinels ever since he read about them in a book when he was only 10 years old. He had already spent years studying people who had one or two heightened senses. At one time, he thought he'd found someone with three enhanced senses. But after testing, the third sense only turned out to be a little better than normal, but not enhanced.
His life changed forever when he met James Joseph Ellison that day at Cascade General Hospital. As he had approached the hospital room where Jim was waiting for some test results, he'd felt this 'sensation' begin to develop deep in his gut. He didn't know what the sensation was at the time and had put it off as nerves. Now as he looked back he knew that it was the beginning of the Sentinel/Guide bond that has continued to strengthen every day since then.
Blair tried to find any information that might be available about a Sentinel's Guide, but all he was able to find were obscure writings that didn't delve much into a Guide's role, other than to say he was a Sentinel's companion that aided and grounded the Sentinel in using his senses. He knew that there was more to being a Guide than that, and even though he was no longer an academic (or at least a practicing academic) he would never stop searching for any and all information regarding Sentinels and Guides.
He brought his attention back the present and pushed the button that would bring his target sheet to him. As the sheet approached him, he lifted off his earmuffs and placed his gun down on the counter after ensuring the safety was on. He had already made that mistake once, accidentally setting off his weapon and hitting the target sheet dead center, even if it was the target sheet two rows over from his!
He glanced up as the target sheet stopped in front of him.
"Alright!" he exclaimed. He got four of the six rounds inside of the 'target' this time and one of the shots was only a couple inches away from the center! He was improving with his shooting, but he knew he would never feel completely comfortable with a gun. At first, every time he shot the thing all he could picture was hitting an innocent person and killing them, but he kept up with the practice telling himself that it was so he could protect Jim. If it came down to protecting Jim by shooting a perp, he truly wanted to believe that he would be able to pull the trigger.
That was his greatest fear at the moment. When the time came and he was 'forced' to use the gun to protect his partner -- would he actually be able to do it? He prayed that he would, after all, there's nothing he wouldn't do for his best friend, partner and Sentinel. He had proved that already when he gave up his academic life a few months ago to protect his Sentinel.
He still deeply missed his academic life and probably always would. After all, he spent half of his life at Rainier University taking and teaching classes. He loved teaching. He loved the spark that students got in their eye when they finally discovered something interesting, discovered something that they didn't even know they wanted -- a thirst for knowledge. He had given that up, and most times he missed it to the point that it hurt. But he was happy with what he was doing now -- becoming Jim's full time partner.
He wasn't sure at first if he really wanted to become a cop. He had thought long and hard about what he wanted. It was then that he realized that for the past four years, his life had been dedicated not only to Jim, but to police work as well. That realization shocked him.
He always thought that it was helping Jim that kept him at the station all that time, but he came to realize that along with helping Jim with his senses, he helped several of the other detectives on different cases and actually helped make some progress in several of them.
He had almost laughed when he finally realized that he loved the police work as much as the other detectives did. He didn't even mind the long, boring stakeouts when nothing happened. If he didn't mind those, then he really must love police work!
The ideal situation for him was what he had prior to his dissertation about 'The Sentinel' being released to the public without his consent, but that was no longer an option since he had declared his work as fraudulent in order to protect his friends and help catch a killer. If he couldn't have that life, he would settle for becoming a cop full time since it would keep him as Jim's partner. After he made that discovery, he had set his mind on becoming a cop and entered the Police Academy.
The next session of the Police Academy started two months after Simon made the offer to Blair in the bullpen, in front of all their friends. He grinned at that thought -- the Major Crimes detectives weren't only Jim's friends, they were his as well and they had proved that to him by supporting him through that whole mess. Not one of them believed Blair was a fraud and they all told him so, telling him that they would be there for him and if there was anything he needed, all he had to do was ask.
It touched Blair deeply to realize that he had many 'true' friends. He had never really had friends he could depend on growing up. He and Naomi moved around so much, and when he started at Rainier he was so young that not many people wanted to socialize with him. Blair used to spend all his time in the Library or talking with his professors, especially his mentor Dr. Eli Stoddard. The man was like a father to Blair and Blair couldn't have asked for a better role model.
Growing up never knowing who his father was, Blair had secretly made Eli his adopted father, and to a certain extent, Simon Banks. Joel Taggart came close, but he was more like a favourite uncle. Blair had always hoped his father was a strong, good, courageous and moral man. One who stood up for what he believed in and truly cared about people. Eli and Simon fit into that category very easily. He respected both men immensely and was truly honoured to know them. With Eli, it was so easy to talk about anything. He could tell Eli his thoughts and feelings without fear of recrimination or disgust. With Simon, there wasn't a man on earth, well other than Jim, that he would trust with his life or the life of someone he cared about. He was always in awe of seeing Simon with his son, Daryl. Simon was always tender, yet firm, and always expressed to Daryl how much he loved him. Blair found himself always seeking Simon's approval and nothing meant more to him than the few times that Simon had told him that he was appreciated, respected and that he did want Blair 'hanging around'. I guess if you combined Eli Stoddard and Simon Banks together, you'd have the world's most perfect father, and Blair would imagine that person as his father.
Blair unhooked the target, picked up his gun and walked out the door, up to the wicket outside.
"Hey there, Burg, did you hit your own target this time?"
Blair mock-glared at the older man behind the wicket, then let a big grin spread across his face. "I'm getting closer Marty. I actually hit the target in the row next to mine this time."
Blair laughed along with the big man. Martin 'Marty' Saunders was the shooting instructor and was also in charge of the ammunition stocks at the Academy. He used to be a member of the S.W.A.T. team before he was shot in the knee during an operation. His knee couldn't be repaired, at least not to the point that he could remain a police officer, but the Police force was his life. When they offered him the job at the Academy, Marty had gladly accepted it.
Blair had only been tagging along with Jim for a few weeks when he met Marty and they hit it off right from the start. Blair had learned that Marty started out his career in the Military then progressed from there to being a cop in Seatle. Blair found that hysterical and exclaimed that maybe everyone who became Military eventually ended up in law enforcement. Blair later found out that Marty had moved to Cascade only ten years ago and that Marty's only family, a wife and son, had been killed seven years previous in a car accident. The son was just six years younger than Blair, and from what people told him, he and Marty's son Mark, had a lot in common. For instance, both were academics and both had more energy than they knew what to do with.
Blair smiled as he turned back to his previous thoughts. Another Father! Blair laughed at the thought. For a kid that grew up without a father, he now had more 'fathers' than he knew what to do with.
"You're doing good in there, Burg", Marty broke into Blair's thoughts. "Before you know it, the S.W.A.T. team will be after you."
"I doubt that will ever happen, Marty, but if it ever did, how could I ever live up to the shadow of the Great 'Bingo'." Blair gave the older man a sly smile. Marty was somewhat of a legend on S.W.A.T. and Blair always liked to tease him about it. Marty never bothered with all the stories of what a 'great' S.W.A.T. officer he was. To him he just did his job, a job he loved.
Marty picked up a towel from behind the counter and threw it at Blair hitting him in the face. "Smartass."
"Better than a 'Dumbass'," Blair defended.
Marty let out a big laugh as he grinned at Blair.
Blair was like a breath of fresh air to the old ex-S.W.A.T. officer. His energy and intelligence, not to mention his enthusiasm was seldom experienced in the police world, where the crime and pain an officer experiences in everyday life on the job can bring a person into a depression. Blair was one of the first people to come see him at the hospital after he was shot. If he was ever in a bad mood when he met up with 'Burg', he would be in a good mood by the time they departed.
Marty referred to Blair as 'Burg' because he thought of Blair as an unstoppable force that if it hits you, will just take you along for the ride, just like an iceberg. Marty knew there was a lot more to Blair than meets the eye. When you first glance at Blair you see only the tip of the iceberg, the true depth of him is hidden below the surface, but you don't see it until you get up close and really look.
The nickname is also a little play on his name, but it was a name that only Marty used for Blair. Someone once referred to Blair as 'Burg' in his presence, but the glare Marty gave the man made any ideas of using the endearing name in the future vanish from the man's mind. Everyone soon knew that only Marty called Blair 'Burg', just like only Jim Ellison called him 'Chief' and only Megan Connor called him 'Sandy'. He had more nicknames than he had years of age.
"No, I'm serious, Burg," Marty continued. "You really are improving with your aim. You still got that little jump when you shoot, but if you keep up with your practicing, you'll get over that pretty quickly. You've improved 200% from what you were like when you first started on the range a week ago." Marty paused as a grin slowly appeared on his face. "At least now you're shooting with your eyes open".
Blair mock-glared at the instructor again.
"Watch it, Marty. I now have a gun and I'm learning how to use it!"
Marty let out another big laugh and tapped Blair on the arm. "Keep it up kid. I don't know what will kill me first, your shooting or your jokes."
"I guess it is a toss up isn't it?" Blair threw at him. "I gotta go, Marty, my self defence class starts in ten minutes."
Blair waved at the big man, who waved back with a smile on his face. Marty was another person who stuck by him when his dissertation was accidentally released a few months ago. Blair never realized just how many friends he had, but if he thought about it, he had more than he ever thought he'd have.
As he approached the gymnasium he thought about what he and his partner would do this weekend. Blair was staying at the Academy residence during the week since the Academy was a two hour drive outside of Cascade and his days were pretty long here, but he went back to the loft for the weekends. It was now Thursday and he found himself looking forward to spending some time with his best friend this weekend.
William Ellison put his head in his hands as he tried to absorb all that had happened in just a short amount of time. In less than one hour, he found the love of his life, found out where his long lost son was only to realize he had been right in front of him for years. He also discovered that he had once again hurt his eldest son. Will he ever do right by Jimmy, it seemed no matter what he did he always ended up hurting his firstborn.
He wished Jimmy had never heard the discussion he had with Nona... Naomi, he corrected himself. He had always known her as Nona, it was going to be hard to think of her by another name. He glanced over at the woman in question. She was in the kitchen fixing some tea for the three of them.
Jimmy was still in front of the balcony door looking out over the city. At first he was afraid that he was in one of those zone things that Blair had explained Jim sometimes goes into when his senses act up.
Blair.
He still couldn't believe that the young man living with Jimmy was his son! What did all this mean for them now? His relationship with Jimmy and Stevie was tenuous and shaky at best. How was this revelation going to affect his relationship with his sons in the future?
Naomi came into the living room and set the tray with a teapot and three cups down on the coffee table. She glanced over at Jim with concern. Jim was just standing there and hadn't said a word for the past 15 minutes. Of course, they all needed a few moments to collect themselves and process what had happened. She was going to definitely need to meditate for a while tonight. She might even break her all time record of time spent meditating while trying to process this.
She glanced over at Billy... or rather William. He was a little pale but he smiled at her when he caught her eye. The smile she fell in love with thirty years ago! How could he still make her feel like a schoolgirl when he smiled at her. She had spent years trying to protect her heart from being hurt again. She had many relationships with different men after Bil...William, but she never let herself really fall in love again. She always left before any of those relationships could get any deeper, she always detached with love. She knew it wasn't really fair to Blair to pack up and leave just when he was getting settled and opening up to a new 'uncle', but she couldn't let what happened with William happen again, and she was not going to allow something like that to happen to her son either. She knew that if she allowed herself to love someone again they would only hurt her, but they would also hurt Blair and she was not going to let that happen. She did what she thought was best not only for herself, but for Blair as well. She couldn't have done too bad of a job because Blair turned out to be a wonderful, caring son of whom she was very proud.
Jim tore himself away from the balcony door and slowly walked over to a chair to sit down across from his father and Naomi. He didn't know quite what to say, but he knew that they had to say something to each other and try to put everything into perspective. Blair would be home tomorrow afternoon for the weekend and if he didn't get some answers, or some things settled first, his guide would know right away that something was wrong.
All three looked at each other, not knowing who should start. Jim decided that he would go first.
"So I take it you two know each other pretty well." Jim knew it was lame, but he had to start somewhere.
"Yeah, we do, or did," Naomi replied. She looked over at William for some help.
"We met back in the summer of 1968 in San Francisco," William continued with the story. "I went there on a business trip and saw her protesting in the park. She was beautiful, full of energy, she just glowed and I think I fell in love with her at first sight, if that's possible."
"What about Mom?" Jim asked tersely. He was trying to keep any emotion out of his voice, but he couldn't help the hurt that crept into it.
"Jimmy," his father continued. "I want you to know that I always did care about your mother. I did love her, I just was never 'in love' with her." He paused, trying to come up with a way of explaining what he had to say to his son. "Your mother and I met when we were barely teenagers. We became friends, not close friends, but friends nonetheless. Our fathers pressured us into marriage. Status in the community was very important to my father."
At this Jim grunted. William looked over at his son upon hearing the sound. "I guess the apple didn't fall far from the tree did it son?"
"Sorry," Jim responded. "I didn't mean to interrupt your story. I want to know what happened, the whole story, Dad... the truth. Can you do that for me?"
William dropped his head down for a moment then lifted it back up to meet his son's gaze. "I want to tell you the truth, Jimmy. You may not like it though."
"As long as it's the truth, I'll just have to deal with it."
"OK then," William took a deep breath and continued on with his story. "Like I said, Grace and I were friends and pressured into marrying by our fathers. My father wanted the Social Status Grace's family provided. Even though they were not a rich family, they were a well respected family. Grace's father wanted to connect to a family with money which my family had plenty of. It was beneficial to both families if we were joined in marriage."
"Grace was dating a friend of ours, Carl, at the time and he fell deeply for her. We were under constant pressure from our fathers and Grace and I didn't have the strength to fight them any longer. Since we did care about each other, we agreed to be married and Grace had to break Carl's heart."
William paused in his story to study the faces of the two people sitting with him. Naomi's face held an expression of sympathy. She always could feel when he was hurting and she was obviously aware of what William was feeling at the moment as he opened up about a private, and painful, time in his life. He looked over at his son. Jimmy's face could have been carved in stone. He knew that look well. Blair once told him that Jim would sometimes 'check his emotions at the door'. It was something Jim had to use as a police officer because of the awful crimes he witnessed each day as a detective in Major Crimes. Jimmy wasn't allowing himself to feel anything yet. William didn't know if this was a good thing or not He didn't know his own son well enough to even guess!
William looked up at the ceiling as he collected his thoughts together enough to continue with the story that he had to tell his son, and Naomi.
"We were married, we had two beautiful children," he looked over at Jim as he said this. "You and Stevie were loved, Jimmy, never think otherwise. You were wanted and you were loved by both your parents right from the start." Jim nodded for William to carry on with the story.
"After Stevie was born, Grace started having 'episodes'. We didn't know what was happening at the time. Now I know it was because she must have had enhanced senses like you, Jimmy, but we didn't know anything about enhanced senses or Sentinels back then. Grace's uncle had already been committed to an asylum because of similar, but more severe episodes, even though that was not public knowledge. He used to rant and rave about all the voices he heard. Grace became frightened when she began losing short periods of time."
"Zone-outs," Jim commented.
"Yeah," William replied. "Again, Jimmy, we didn't know what was happening at the time. I took Grace to doctors but no one could tell us what was wrong with her. All they said was that it might be the onset of Schizophrenia. I never told Grace what the doctors said, I didn't want to frighten her any further. They started her on medications and after a few months, it seemed as if the 'episodes' disappeared and everything went back to normal. By that time, Grace had grown distant towards me. It was like she didn't want me anywhere near her anymore and I started to spend more time at the office. After a year of that, we were just two people living in the same house. We stopped sharing a bedroom and just spoke to each other about you and Stevie."
Jim lowered his head as his father's words hit home. He and Carolyn had grown apart to the point that they were strangers at the end of their marriage. It wasn't until after they had been divorced that they had become better friends than they ever were before or during their marriage. Jim couldn't believe it, but he understood where his father was coming from.
"It was at this point that I went on a business trip to San Francisco and met Nona... Naomi. I don't know what to say to you Jimmy. I really did fall in love with her. I had never felt more alive in my life as when I was with her. I had feelings for her I had never felt before. Naomi took all my worries away, if only for a little while. You will never know how that felt for me Jimmy, to just feel for a little while and not have to worry about all my problems with Grace. When it came time for me to return home to you boys and Grace, I felt like I was leaving my heart behind in San Francisco."
Naomi hesitantly reached her hand and gently squeezed William's shoulder. This was the first time she had heard William's side of the story and she felt ashamed at how she had reacted in the past. It was no excuse for hurting her like he did, but she could understand the agony he must have gone through in his life.
William reached up, placing his hand gently over Naomi's. She was still one of the strongest and most caring people he had ever known. He never did deserve to have her in his life. If things had worked out differently, would she still have survived 'William Ellison'? Would he have changed into 'Billy' or would he still have still become the well-known, cold 'William Ellison' even if she was in his life? He shivered at the thought of denying her spirit like he did with Jimmy and Stevie.
"When I got back to Cascade, Naomi was all I could think about. I missed her so much!" William stated. "Grace started becoming cold towards me and we started arguing more and more. Just about every time we saw each other, we would argue... about everything and nothing, all we did was argue. After a few weeks of this I had to see Naomi again. I couldn't stand my life the way it was. I missed Naomi! I arranged a leave of absence from my office and told Grace that I had important business in San Francisco and that I would be gone for several weeks. Things were so bad between us she wasn't too concerned with the thought of me being away for that length of time. I went to San Francisco and spent four weeks with Naomi. They were four of the most wonderful weeks of my life and by the time I had to return home to Cascade I knew that I had to divorce Grace. I couldn't stay with her and I wanted to be with Naomi for the rest of my life."
At this point William stood up from the couch and slowly walked over to the balcony door. He looked out over Cascade for a few moments before he continued on with the story. "When I got home, Grace became furious and just lost it. She twisted her face in disgust at me when I greeted her after returning from the airport. I was confused and startled and I didn't understand how she could have known about Naomi. Thinking back, I believe she smelled Naomi on me, but I didn't know that at the time. She started calling me names and telling me that she knew about my 'tramp'." He glanced over at Naomi with an apologetic look on his face.
Naomi nodded at him, understanding that this is what Grace felt about her, not William.
"She started screaming at me that if I didn't forget about 'that woman' that she would leave with you and Stevie and I would never see you again! I tried to talk to her, to calm her down but she was just uncontrollable. She would scream whenever I touched her. She'd cringe whenever I spoke to her. She kept pulling at her hair and screaming that I was hurting her, that I was killing her. I was so scared that she had finally lost her mind."
William walked back over to the couch and sat down. He turned so that he was looking at both Jimmy and Naomi.
"I brought her to the hospital. I couldn't think of anything else to do. They kept telling me that she was schizophrenic or that she had some other mental condition. The drugs weren't working and she kept slipping in and out of the fugue states more often."
Jim looked at his father as his mind latched onto the truth. "Her zone outs got worse?"
"Yeah, I think so," his father replied. "After staying like that for a few days, I realized that no matter how I felt about Naomi, I couldn't leave Grace when she was like this. I took another trip back to see Naomi, to explain to her that even though I wanted to be with her and wanted a divorce from Grace, that I couldn't do it right now. I was hoping, however naively or I should say stupidly, that Naomi would understand and would just say 'It's OK darling, I'll wait and we'll be together after Grace gets better'." William shook his head as he let out a short laugh. "I really was lost in my own little fantasy world wasn't I?"
Again William paused as he tried to sort through all the memories and feelings that were flooding his mind.
"I went to Naomi, not really sure what I was going to say to her. She welcomed me with open arm and a big smile. She hugged me so tightly and for just a moment I thought everything would be all right. That's when she told me that we were going to have a baby. My brain just completely shut down because what I ended up saying was not what I wanted to say. I just blurted out that I was married and my wife and children were waiting for me at home."
William reached over and gently lifted Naomi's hand in between both of his. She looked up at him with tears in her eyes. She was lost in the memories just like he was. How much he must have hurt this beautiful creature with his sudden and blunt revelation. She never had any clue that he was married. He had never mentioned anything about his life in Cascade. As he looked once again at the pain on Naomi's face, he cursed himself again for the fool and idiot that he was.
Naomi squeezed William's hand and briefly closed her eyes as she addressed the two men before her.
"I was so happy to see you. I had just found out a few days before that I was pregnant and I wanted so badly to tell you the good news. At least I thought it was good news." She paused for just a moment, still clasping William's hand. "I had already started planning our life together. We would be married and we would have several children." She glanced over at Jim and smiled. "I wanted to have all boys!"
Jim grinned at her and let out a brief laugh at that statement.
"I had the perfect life planned out for us and when I heard what he said, it was like everything just fell apart. I was shocked at first. I didn't know what to say and when he just stood there looking at me with this blank look on his face, I became furious and just had to get him away from me. I threw him out of the apartment. After a few hours had passed, I came to the conclusion that I couldn't have what I wanted. The man I loved was married with a family and the last thing I wanted to be was a homewrecker. I packed up as much as I could and left San Francisco that same night. I decided that I would raise my child by myself and that I would love him or her with all my heart. That I would love my child so much that there would be no more of my heart left for anyone else to hurt."
William cringed at what Naomi said. He never truly realized the damage he had done to Naomi until now. She could have had such a wonderful life filled with love if she had only never met a bastard by the name of William Ellison. "I'm so sorry, Nona. I'm so sorry I hurt you. If I could go back I would do so many things differently. I was blessed with having so many wonderful people in my life and I just about destroyed each one of them. You, Grace, Jimmy and Stevie. God, I probably hurt Blair too and I wasn't even physically a part of his life. I destroy everything I touch, maybe it was for the best that Blair grew up without me in his life because I probably would have destroyed him as well." William lowered his head as the tears began to fall.
Naomi reached over and hugged William to her. "Don't say that, Billy! It wasn't you, it was the circumstances. There was no way that things really could have worked out the way we wanted them to. I never understood before, but I do now. It doesn't erase the pain we all felt but it does explain things that I didn't understand before, especially since I know about Jim's enhanced senses and how devastating they could be when not controlled."
Jim knew how hard it had been for everyone around him when his senses came on-line a few years ago. He knew that he had pushed everyone's patience to the breaking point. How could he fault his father when he knew the pain these damned senses could inflict not only on the person who has them, but the people around them! And his father's affair with Naomi, he couldn't wish it had never happened because then they wouldn't have Blair... he wouldn't have his best friend and Guide and he would be locked in some looney bin right now, probably trapped in some sort of deep zone-out. Suddenly his thoughts flew back to his mother.
"Dad?" he asked, "what really happened to mom?"
After a few moments pause to collect himself, William went on to give his son the explanation he asked for.
"She kept going in and out of those fugue states," William explained. "It kept up for months after I came back from that last meeting with Naomi, but they gradually started getting a little better until Grace could eventually be released from the hospital. She came back to live with us for over a year but we just couldn't make it work, so we decided she would move in with her mother."
"I remember visiting her there a few times, but what happened later when she 'disappeared' from our lives?"
"I had gotten a lead on where Naomi might possibly be," William continued. "I arranged for a trip to check out this information. It was only for one, two weeks tops, to see if the information panned out. I had been searching for Naomi for several years at that point and had just about given up. It seemed like my last chance to find her."
William had to stop at this point to get a hold of his emotions. Telling this story to his son was one of the hardest things he'd ever had to do, but he had to give Jim the answers he deserved.
"I phoned Grace to ask her to look after you and Stevie for a couple weeks while I went on this trip and she flipped out on me. I think she sensed I was lying to her at the time and I guess she couldn't handle it."
William reached over and gripped his son's shoulders. He knew this was going to be hard for Jim to hear, especially since Jim had the same senses that seemed to take his mother from him. He kept hold of Jim as he continued his explanation.
"I couldn't bear to tell you and Stevie the truth about her mental state, so I told you that she had left us."
Jim was stunned as more pieces of the puzzle fit together.
"I heard that phone call," Jim stated.
"What?" William Questioned. "You couldn't have, you were at the park at the time. I know for a fact you weren't in the house."
"I had just gotten back from the park and met up with Stevie in front of the house," Jim explained. "I asked him if you were going to join us for dinner and my hearing tuned into the house where I heard you on the phone with mom. You mentioned something about Alimony and you told her it was an important conference you had to attend."
William lowered his head in shame at the knowledge that his young son had heard him lying to his mother.
"It was around the time Carl Haddish was killed!" Jim exclaimed.
William's facial expression became strained at the mention of Carl Haddish. "Yeah, Jimmy," he confessed. "It was around that time. It was only a week or so after that call that Grace slipped into a permanent zone.
William braced himself to deliver the devastating news to his son. "She was in that zone for months. Her system just couldn't handle it. She died a little bit each day. After about five months, her heart just couldn't take the strain anymore and she just slipped away." William went over to his son and knelt down in front of him placing his hand on Jim's knee. "To this day I don't know if she was ever really aware of what was happening to her. I pray to God that she didn't." At the look of pain that appeared on Jim's face, he reached up and pulled his son into his arms and embraced him as hard as he could.
Jim placed his arms around his father and let out all the emotions he felt as a child when he discovered his mother had left him, and the emotions he felt now that he knew the truth about the pain his mother and father went through. Now that he knew his mother didn't leave because of him and his senses.
He grabbed onto his father as the tears fell down his cheeks. Naomi quickly came over to them and enveloped the two men in her own arms. Jim immediately pulled Naomi into his grasp as they released all their pent up feelings of the past years.
CHAPTER THREE
Wham!
Blair hit the mat for the third time in as many minutes. As he gazed up at the familiar sight of the gymnasium ceiling, a face came into view.
"Blair, I hope you aren't toning down your moves because I'm a woman." A woman hovered over him with a light brown pony tail slipping off her shoulder and swinging back and forth in front of Blair's vision.
"Who me?" Blair questioned. "Would I do a thing like that, Herc?"
Carrie Simms tilted her head as she studied her training partner lying on the mat in front of her. "Yes, Cass," she responded. "I think that you would, especially since you're one of the last remaining gentlemen I know." It was this very idea that prompted her to call Blair 'Cass' which was short for Casanova. She stretched out her hand and Blair reached up to grasp it as she helped pull him back onto his feet.
"Thanks," Blair said as he straightened out his T-shirt. "I think I'm getting way too familiar with the view from down there. Do you think you can give an old man like me a break and stop throwing me down every chance you get?" He said this with a smile so that Carrie would know he was only joking with her.
Carrie Simms was 24 years old and very determined to become a cop. She was only 5 foot 5 inches tall and weighed about 125 pounds, so she got a lot of teasing about her being 'too small to be a real cop'. She and Blair started to hang out together after the first few days at the Academy. They had a lot in common, especially since neither one of them were really welcomed by the other cadets. Only a few cadets gave Blair a hard time about the 'fraud' issue. Most of them just pretty much ignored him, but there were a few, like Carrie, who were actually friendly.
"Now, Cass," Carrie said with her hands on her hips. "You know that if I give you a break, then I'll have to give everyone else a break as well." She tried hard to keep the smile off her face, but just couldn't do it. She burst into a big grin then laughed at the look of mock horror on Blair's face.
Blair and Carrie got along like they had known each other their whole lives. The only other people Blair got along this well with, were the gang from Major Crimes. A few of the guys in their Academy class tried to hit on Carrie, but she was strictly there to become a cop and would not let her attention be distracted from her goal.
Carrie's father was a cop who had been killed in the line of duty when she was only 10 years old. He had spent every minute of those ten years spoiling his daughter rotten and she was the typical 'Daddy's Girl' with her father absolutely doting on her. She was devastated when he was killed and ever since then, she was determined to follow in her father's footsteps. Carrie's father had loved being a cop and was proud of his chosen profession. He always told his little girl that he felt he was 'out there making a difference', and that is exactly what Carrie wanted to do. Blair really admired her determination and conviction in her training to become an officer.
The coach blew the whistle that proclaimed the training session to be over. Blair let out a relieved breath. This was the last activity of his day. It was now 8:30 pm and he was exhausted. All he wanted to do was go back to his dorm, take a shower and become unconscious real quick. Tomorrow was Friday and he was looking forward to spending some time with Jim.
"What are you and Jim planning to do this weekend?" Carrie asked as she walked out of the gymnasium alongside him.
"I'm not sure yet. When I spoke to him a couple days ago, he mentioned that he may be able to get tickets to the Jag's playoff game on Saturday night. He didn't promise, but he said he'd try."
Carrie grinned up at Blair. Blair spoke quite often, and quite fondly, of his best friend Jim Ellison. At first, she thought they might be 'involved', since Blair really was too good to be true, but now that she knew Blair 'ladies man' Sandburg, she knew that they were just two guys who happened to have a rare, true friendship. She had never had a friend like that and she was a little envious of the relationship between the two men, but she could see how someone could easily become Blair's friend. He was a very rare breed of man. She had only known him a little less than three weeks and already she felt a deep friendship towards him, not to mention a fierce protectiveness towards him as well. Her anger flared when she heard a couple of the other cadets taunting Blair about being a 'fraud' only a couple days after she met him. She never had many male friends growing up, but she and Blair just really connected from the start and she was very proud to call him her friend. Even when he was being harassed by other cadets, Blair always handled himself with dignity, making Carrie feel so proud to have such an amazing person in her life. Her father would have loved him.
"Well, I hope you two have a great time this weekend," Carrie yelled as she ran towards her own dorm. "I'll see you tomorrow morning before you leave."
Blair waved at the petite girl as he turned to enter his own dorm. They had only two classes scheduled tomorrow and he would be on the road back to Cascade by 11:30 am, noon tops. He jogged up the stairs to his second floor room. His shower and bed awaited.
Jim woke up the next morning feeling emotionally drained. He never thought it was possible to feel every single human emotion in one evening, but he did -- last night. After Naomi and his father's relationship, his mother's 'sensory' problems and the revelation of Blair being his brother was bombarded onto him one after the other, Jim felt like he was going to enter into some sort of an emotional zone-out.
Unbelievably, the revelations seems to have strengthened his need to reconcile with his father. He could now understand his father's fear of his Sentinel abilities when he was a child, and he also understood why his mother had 'left' so suddenly. He wasn't abandoned! It didn't ease all of the pain he felt growing up, but at least now it had some sort of logic to it.
They had finally decided to call it a night at about two o'clock in the morning. It then took Jim an additional hour to get to sleep. After the emotional evening, he kept searching for the comforting heartbeat from the bedroom below.
He had offered Blair's bed to Naomi, knowing Blair wouldn't mind, but she had refused saying that they all needed some 'private time' to process all that had been revealed and discussed this evening'. She was right. Jim knew that it would have been awkward walking downstairs in the morning and greeting each other before they've had a chance to think about everything that had happened the night before.
Jim took a deep breath as he pulled himself out of bed. It was 7 am and he had to get ready for work. He was only working half a day today. Since Blair was due to be home somewhere around noon, Jim had asked Simon for the afternoon off. Simon had given him his OK and told him to have a good weekend catching up with his guide. At times, Simon may not have liked all the 'Sentinel stuff' but he did understand, more than anyone, the deep connection between Sentinel and Guide and always supported them when they needed their 'connecting time'.
Jim had mixed emotions about his guide's return today. He was anxious to see his best friend, but he was nervous about how he was going to react when he saw Blair, knowing that he was his brother! He didn't know what to say or how to act towards him.
The night before, he, his father and Naomi had all agreed that they should not reveal any of this to Blair yet until they had gotten it all straightened out between them. They figured that Blair would need the support of all of them, especially Jim, and it would be better for Blair if they all had 'absorbed' this information themselves and had their heads together so that they could concentrate on Blair and his feelings when they told him.
They all agreed that this weekend was too soon to be springing this information on Blair. They needed this upcoming week to come to terms with everything, then they would probably be ready next weekend to tell Blair the truth. Jim would feel too uncomfortable keeping this secret from Blair any longer than that. After the dissertation fiasco, they promised each other that they wouldn't keep anything from each other again if they wanted this partnership to work. Their trust in each other had been greatly shaken during the past year and Jim didn't want to do anything that would jeopardize his relationship with his guide ever again.
Jim didn't like the thought of hiding this from Blair, even if it was only for a week. He was still in a daze and knew he wasn't in any condition to be able to give Blair the kind of support he knew Blair would need once this information was revealed to him. No, it would be better if they waited until everything had settled down a little before throwing this at Blair. Then they had to reveal it to Steven.
Jim entered the bathroom for his shower. He knew he had to try to settle down before he saw Blair or else Blair would know something was bothering him.
Jim relaxed as the hot water hit his skin. He could do this. He had to do this, for Blair and for himself.
Mitchell Strand laughed at the joke his best friend and 'second in command' Jason told him. It was the kind of joke he liked, cruel, dirty and twisted, and he felt some of his nerves settle. Today was the day that he and the gang had been planning for weeks.
He was so relieved to know that the burden of his annoying cousin was lifted from him.
Mitchell and Monk had confronted Freddy the night before. Monk had bound and gagged Freddy as Mitchell had listed all of Freddy's faults one by one. After pointing out Freddy's lack of loyalty and respect for his own cousin's privacy, he had spit on Freddy's face, then let Monk loose on him. Monk had beaten Freddy to death, chopping off his hands post mortem, which seemed fitting since Freddy's incessant hand-drumming drove them all crazy. He'd felt a twinge of guilt when that was done, but he quickly let that go. As of now, all obstacles were out of the way.
Freddy had the computer program finished that would help bypass the security system. All their equipment and men were getting into place, and every contingence had been taken into consideration. Everything was going according to plan so far. He thought back on how they came upon this golden opportunity.
***Flashback -- Three months ago***
Wally Burton walked into the Cascade Savings and Loans Bank. He had to see his brother Joshua who was the manager there to ask him for a loan of some money. A loan, Wally grinned at that because Joshua would never ask for it back. After their security guard father died when Wally was only eight years old, his 17 year old brother helped his mother raise Wally. He would stop into the bank every now and then to get a bit of cash from Joshua to tide him over for a little while.
He walked across the lobby of the bank over to the door to his brother's office. He turned the doorknob and opened the door just an inch or two, but fortunately for him he never yelled out his usual greeting of 'what's up' once he heard his brother on the telephone. He paused where he was and just listened a moment. What he heard peaked his interest and he carefully closed the door until it was only opened a crack so he could continue to listen to the conversation.
"You don't need to worry about the printing plates sir, we've added extra security measures to both bank vaults to ensure that they'll be safe once they arrive at the bank in three month's time." Joshua's voice floated across the room.
There was a brief pause and then Joshua continued, "We've added some pressure sensitive tiles to the flooring leading to both the main bank vault that will hold the plates as well as the vault in the basement that will hold the printing paper. We've also added five extra surveillance cameras which are highly concealed in the hallway leading to the vaults. As an added precaution, only myself and the Assistant Bank Manager are even aware that the printing plates and paper are going to be arriving here. Our employees aren't aware that they will be here for those two weeks."
Wally's eyes grew large as he realized what he was actually hearing. Printing plates! Printing paper! Oh my God. He had to find out more about this.
"I'm aware of what the consequences could be if something were to happen to either of the items once they are in our possession, but I assure you that we are doing everything absolutely necessary to ensure they are kept safe until they can be transferred. I've got all the details in my personal log which I'll bring over to your office after work this evening. If it would help ease any apprehension you may feel, you can keep the book in your own personal safe until the transfer is completed. I already know the details frontwards and backwards, so it's not necessary for me to keep it here in my office. It would probably be more secure in your office anyway."
Immediately a plan formed in Wally's head. If he could just get Joshua out of his office for a few minutes, he could get his hands on that book and photocopy what he needed to show the guys. The photocopy machine was just in the room next to Joshua's office, so he could be quick as long as Joshua was distracted. Now if only he could think up something to distract him.
Suddenly he heard a commotion in the main teller area. He walked down the hallway and glanced around the corner. There was a well dressed man at one of the tellers kiosks demanding that he be treated better than what he was. He started throwing around phrases like 'Do you know who I am young lady' and 'I could have your job for this' and then finally he exclaimed, 'I demand to speak to the manager young woman, I have never in my life been treated with such disrespect'.
Wally grinned and started back towards Joshua's office. Today must really be his lucky day. As he approached the office door he heard Joshua's phone ring and his brother answered it as Wally knocked once on the door then opened it to let himself into the office.
"OK Linda," Joshua replied into the phone. "I'll be right there." Joshua hung up the phone and looked at his brother. "Bad time here, bro! Can you come back later?"
"Man, I really need to talk to you, I won't be long," Wally responded.
"OK," Joshua replied. "Just stay here in my office, I've got something to take care of. I'll be back as soon as I can." With that Joshua left the office, closing the door behind him.
As soon as Joshua was gone, Wally ran over to the wall safe behind the desk and quickly opened it. Joshua was always transparent with his pass codes, apparently he was the same with the code to his office safe. Wally bypassed the papers in the safe and went straight to the book that was almost hidden beneath all the papers. It was only a small book and when he flicked through it he noticed that there were about 15 or 16 pages full of information about the security for the printing plates and paper. Even the codes to the vaults were included in the book. He slipped out of the office to the room next door and as quickly as he could photocopied all the pages. He put the photocopies in his inside jacket pocket and returned to Joshua's office to place the book back into the safe in the same place he got it from. He closed the safe and then went around the desk to sit in one of the available client chairs to wait for his brother to return. It was only a couple minutes later that Joshua returned complaining about 'big shot know-it-alls who thought they were God'.
Joshua sat down behind his desk and turned his attention to his younger brother. They talked for a few minutes and then Wally asked Joshua for some money. Joshua, of course, took out his wallet and gave him some. After a few more minutes of talking, they said their goodbyes and Wally left 'Cascade Savings and Loans' with the security plans in his jacket pocket.
***End of Flashback***
It took a lot of planning to get the 'operation' started. One of the gang, Matthew, the only one of them that didn't have a criminal record, got a job as a night cleaner at the bank. Freddy, Mitchell's computer expert cousin, got involved when he eavesdropped on his cousin and wanted 'in' on the action. It was fortunate for the gang because even though Roan was pretty good at computers, having spent some time in the joint for minor computer hacking, it would have taken a lot longer for him to design a program to bypass the security of the bank. Freddy designed and completed the program in a fraction of the time it would have taken Roan, and this gave them the extra time needed to go over every detail of the plan and taking every consideration into play. Once the security bypass program was completed, Mitchell decided to let Freddy develop a sense of security before he got rid of him. He just couldn't trust someone who was only included in the plan because of his sneaking around.
With everything in place, all they had to do was wait until nightfall. Roan would put the security bypass program into play, then he would monitor the security cameras and deal with any problems there. Because of his janitorial job, Matthew would be able to get them into the bank, Mitchell would crack the safe holding the 'plates' while Jason took care of the 'paper' in the basement of the bank. Monk and Wally would have the van running in case they needed a quick getaway, with Monk at the wheel and Wally at the rear van door ready to open and close them for a quick pick up of the guys and a fast getaway while Bruce was preparing a distraction for the police. Bruce could take that chance since he only had one strike against him and it wasn't a serious offence. He trusted the guys to be there for him and that he would have access to the money once he got out if he had to face any jail time for his 'distraction'.
The Spades contained a strange, eclectic group of people, but they were his family. They weren't the usual 'thug' gang, but a gang that used their heads, although it didn't always keep them out of trouble. They had participated in a couple turf wars always fighting for the right to have a place to call their own. What each member of the gang really wanted was their own place where they can do what they wanted without the added violence of the other, more violent gangs trying to take it away from them, a home none of them ever had. Mitchell was the most violent of the group, except for Monk who really enjoyed inflicting pain. Whereas Mitchell had to psych himself up in order to participate in killing Freddy, Monk hadn't needed any encouragement. He'd hated Freddy more than Mitchell and could barely keep himself from killing Freddy earlier than they did. Monk took great pleasure in killing Freddy. Mitchell thought of himself and Jason as the leaders, Jason being the smarter one, but Mitchell knew how to lead and to get them to do what needed to be done. Monk was the enforcer who protected the 'weaker' ones who were smart, but definitely needed guidance.
Mitchell had numerous opportunities to join other gangs, but he was brought into the Spades at an early age, and even though he, Monk and Jason were the only ones from the original gang who were still alive today, this gang was his family, his home.
After this job, they would set up down in Miami until the heat settled, then they would print the money and using the brains of the younger gang members, set themselves up so that they would never want for anything for the rest of their lives. They would resettle into their very own territory and no one would be able to take it away from them.
Just a few more hours and he can give the 'green light' for the plan to begin.
Jim finished up the report on his desk and went to Simon's office to hand it over to him. It was his initial report on the crime scene Simon called him in on yesterday. Jim had all his paperwork updated so that he could leave as soon as Blair got back in Cascade.
He glanced at his watch, it was 11:50 am. Blair should be here within the next half hour. He hoped Blair wouldn't sense that something was on Jim's mind. This morning, Jim had thought a lot about last night's revelations and finally decided that he was going to put it temporarily on hold until Blair's 'visit' was over, then he would sit down with his father and Naomi and they would straighten everything out so that by next weekend, they would all be able to sit down with Blair and tell him everything.
He knocked on the office door and waited until he heard Simon's 'come' shouted before he opened it and walked inside.
"I've got that report you wanted on the murder from yesterday," Jim said as he seated himself in the chair in front of Simon's desk.
Simon took the report from Jim and glanced at it briefly before he put it aside to read later.
"Jim," Simon started. "What's going on with you. I can't remember the last time I saw you so distracted and you've been like it ever since you got here this morning."
Jim glanced at his captain and friend. "It's just my father sir," Jim obfuscated. It wasn't exactly a lie. "We had a conversation last night and got a lot of things out in the open. I just have a lot to think about right now so I'm a little distracted."
"I'm glad Sandburg is coming back today. He can probably help you sort through some of it," Simon confessed. "Lord knows he's the only one that can settle you down."
Jim grinned at this. Blair was most certainly the only person who could settle him down. Whether he used his voice or just a simple touch or a look, his guide always did have a calming affect on Jim.
"He should be here soon, Simon," Jim pointed out. It was at that moment that he felt his hearing automatically focus until he heard the comforting heartbeat of his guide as Blair entered the building. "As a matter of fact, he's just coming up in the elevator."
"How did you..." Simon started to ask but stopped himself shaking his head. "Never mind, I don't want to know."
Jim laughed at his boss as he heard Blair enter the bullpen. He turned his head to see his partner's grinning face looking back at him.
"Alright Jim," Simon began. "Take your partner and get out of here. Make sure the kid has a good time Jim, my contacts at the Academy tell me he's been working hard and is doing really well despite a little bit of harassment from a few cadets."
Jim's brow furrowed at that. Who was giving his partner a hard time and where could he hide the body when he was finished with them.
"Now Jim," Simon continued when he saw the look on Jim's face. "Blair's alright. If he wanted help he would ask for it, let it be. If he asks for help, then you can go pound some hapless cadet." Simon finished with a knowing grin.
Jim looked at Simon in shock. Sometimes it was uncanny how well his captain knew him. It seemed there were times Simon could almost read his thoughts, of course those times always dealt with his partner and Simon knew how protective Jim was of his best friend and guide.
Simon got up from behind his desk and went over to the door. He opened it and proceeded to shout "Sandburg."
Blair waved to one of the officers in the PD garage as he headed for the elevator to take him up to Major Crimes.
He'd gone straight to the Police Station once he got back into Cascade after his last class this morning. He was a bit early, but he knew that Jim was probably already aware that he was here.
His Sentinel had told him months ago that he automatically focussed in on his Guide's heartbeat the moment Blair stepped foot in the same building Jim was in. Blair reasoned that it was probably due to the fact that the Sentinel needed to be aware of where his guide was at all times and that he was unconsciously always searching for his heartbeat.
The elevator door opened and Blair flew into Major Crimes. Jim wasn't at his desk and when he took a quick glance around, he noticed that he was in Simon's office talking with the Captain.
Jim automatically turned his head toward his partner and they grinned at each other.
Blair decided to wait over by Jim's desk until he was finished with Simon. As he approached Brown's desk, H lifted his head from his paperwork and shouted out "Hairboy! The Academy let you out to play for the weekend did they?"
Blair stopped alongside Henri Brown's desk. "Hey H, How's it going."
"Not too bad, Hairboy, but we'll all be pretty glad when you come back here," Brown answered.
"H, my hair is short now, when are you going to stop calling me 'Hairboy'? And I'm sure Jim hasn't been that unbearable that you guys are wishing me back here so soon."
"You'll always be 'Hairboy' to us, Sandburg. Whether your hair is long or short, it's still longer than anyone else's around here and if I know you, I'm sure it won't be long before it's back to it's pre-academy length," Henri quipped.
It was at that point that Blair heard Simon's office door open and his soon-to-be Captain's bellow.
"Sandburg!"
"I've been summoned, H," Blair pointed out to Henri. "See you later, man." With a quick wave, Blair crossed the bullpen to Simon's office.
"Sandburg," Simon demanded. "Take your partner and don't let me see his ugly mug in this bullpen before Monday morning."
"No problem, Sir," Blair responded with a quick eyebrow raise from Simon at the 'sir'. Turning to his partner, Blair continued. "Come on, Jim, our weekend of freedom awaits."
Jim laughed at his partner as Blair bounced up and down. Blair was full of energy and raring to go. Jim and Blair said goodbye to Simon and exited the bullpen.
"Oh, Jim," Blair exclaimed as the elevator doors began to close. "I heard about this new exhibit at the Cascade Museum of Natural History that you're just going to love..."
Simon lost the rest of the conversation as the elevator doors closed completely. He chuckled as he realized he was actually starting to miss the kid when he was away at the academy for entire weeks. Tomorrow night's poker game at Jim and Blair's was going to be a lot of fun, he mused as he turned back into his office and closed the door behind him.
William opened his front door to see the face of the woman he loved, the woman he had always loved.
"Nona!" William exclaimed. "I mean, Naomi. Come on in."
Naomi entered the house and took a quick glance around the foyer before turning back to face William. "I thought we would need some more time to talk, especially after last night."
William took the sweater that Naomi had draped over her arm and hung it up in the closet. "Please, let's go sit in the living room."
Naomi followed William into a room off the foyer and sat down in an obviously expensive sitting chair. William sat in the chair on her left, perpendicular to her own. William reached over and clasped Naomi's hand.
Naomi let out a soft gasp as she felt William's hand gently squeeze her own. "Billy," she said softly as she let her eyelids close and concentrated on the touch of William's hand on her own. "It's been so long," she started, but was stopped as William interrupted her.
"Naomi, I want you to know right now that I did love you." William looked deeply into Naomi's eyes as she opened them to look over at him. "Please, don't ever think otherwise." He looked down at their clasped hands. "I can't believe you're really here. I spent several years looking for you, but I could never find any 'Nona Saunders'."
"It's been years since I've gone by that name, Billy," Naomi replied. "My name is actually Naomi Saunders, but I went by Nona when I was younger." She paused for a moment, collected her thoughts, then continued on. "After we parted, I had no where left to go. My father was sending me money to help pay for my apartment in San Francisco, and he used to stop by every two months to check up on me. He told me when I wanted to move out and become independent that I would come crawling back to him sooner or later.
Naomi squeezed William's hand just a little tighter before continuing. "Suddenly I was pregnant at eighteen..."
William gasped at this announcement. "Eighteen?" he questioned. "You told me you were twenty-two!"
"I guess both of us had a problem with telling the truth back then," Naomi replied with a nervous half grin.
William was shocked. He knew that he had fallen in love with -- and had an affair with -- a younger woman, but to find out that she was practically a child, barely legal, he felt like one of those 'dirty old men' even though he, himself, had been the relatively young age of 29 at the time.
Naomi gathered her thoughts back together and continued on with her story. "Anyway, I was eighteen, pregnant and alone. My father was bound to find out, so I decided that I would go back home to Seatle and hope that he would help me and my baby."
A single tear fell down her cheek and William reached over and gently wiped the tear away, cupping her cheek for a moment to give her comfort and support in telling him about a part of her life that was obviously painful for her.
"Daddy was furious!" She forced herself to gain control over her emotions and once again clasped William's hand for support. "He yelled at me, calling me a tramp and that I was an idiot to let this happen to me. He told me that I was not going to keep this baby, that I was either to abort it or give it up for adoption. I would then be welcomed back to live in his house, under his rules."
Naomi gave a short, humourless laugh before continuing on again. "I told him to 'go to hell'. That I was not going to give up my baby and that if he didn't like it, then he didn't have to be a part of my life."
"Oh Naomi," William's voice dripped with sympathy. "I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I wish I could have been there for you."
"I think I know that now, but back then, I believed you didn't really want me in your life because you already had a family. I believed that I had only been a distraction or a fling." Naomi moved back from William but still held onto his hand. "Daddy stormed out of the house, but not before he demanded that I be gone before he returned and that from that moment on, he no longer had a daughter."
Naomi gently let go of William's hand and got up to move over to the window. She had to move around to dispel some of the nervous energy she felt building up. "My mom spent the next hour helping me pack as many of my belongings that I had and put them into her car. She handed me the keys to her own car and gave me a piece of paper with the name of a good friend listed on it. She asked me to stay with her friend for a few days until she could take care of a few things for me before I moved on anywhere else."
Naomi turned around and looked over at William with a big smile on her face. "A few days later, my mom showed up at her friend's place. She sat me down and told me that she had put her own trust fund that she had received from her own parents, into a special account in my name and that I had access to it whenever I needed any money."
She walked over to William and once again sat down in the chair she previously occupied, next to him. "The trust fund was quite significant, but it wasn't until later that I found out that she had placed her entire trust fund into this account. She had left nothing for herself. She told me that she wanted to make sure that the baby and I were taken care of and that we never found ourselves homeless or hungry. She told me that I had better take care of her grandbaby, that she loved me and my big brother more than anything and that I was to keep in contact with her through her friend that I was staying with at that time. We parted the next day, but we saw each other several times over the next couple years whenever I visited her friend. I never saw Daddy again until Mom's funeral three years later. He wouldn't even look at me through the entire service and when I approached him after the service, all he said to me was that now he had no family left. He said that he was all alone now and handed me a letter then turned and walked away from me without another word."
William wanted to say something to Naomi to comfort her, but he didn't know what to say. "Naomi, I'm so sorry, I just can't express to you how sorry I am that you had to go through that all alone. I wish I had been there for you."
"The worst thing is that I didn't read the letter until I had gotten home later that day. It was written by Daddy and in it he..." Naomi stopped briefly to try and compose herself enough to continue. "He wrote the letter like he was writing to a stranger. He told me that my brother had been killed in Vietnam. They had only been informed about this a month before and had a private funeral for him only two weeks ago. He said he forbid Mom to tell me this because as far as he was concerned, I was not a part of the family anymore," her speech hitched as a tear slipped down her cheek. "They never had a body to bury so there isn't even a place I could go to say goodbye to my own brother." William pulled Naomi into a strong hug and Naomi put her arms around the only man she had ever loved and soaked up the love she felt emanating from him. William gave her the strength she needed to continue on with her story. "I never really had any closure with my brother. There was no grave, no goodbye. Nothing to really help me put that part of my life to rest. For years afterwards I had hoped that it was all a mistake and that someday I would turn around to see my big brother standing behind me and he'd tap me on the nose like he used to do when we were younger and say 'it's OK Nonie, you'll always have me, I'm sorry I was away for so long'."
Naomi gave William a comforting smile and a quick squeeze of his hand. He loved it that she felt comfortable enough to touch him like this. She had held his hand several times throughout the story and it filled his heart each time she had reached for his hand, or when he reached for her hand and she didn't flinch away from him.
"After I left home, I changed my name from my nickname 'Nona' back to my actual name of 'Naomi' and I took my mother's maiden name of 'Sandburg'."
"I hate to think of you being alone, trying to raise our child and without any emotional support," William said with a lowered head.
Naomi reached over and gently lifted William's head until he was looking her in the eye. "I did have emotional support the first few years after we 'separated', honey," she responded. "My mother was there when our son was born."
William got to his feet and slowly walked over to the fireplace, placing a hand on the mantle and looking into the empty hearth. "I was never a good father to Jimmy and Stevie, especially after Grace died, and I didn't even know if my third child was a boy or a girl." He lifted his head up and looked at the ceiling. "I guess I won't be winning any 'father of the year' awards will I?"
Naomi swiftly left the chair she was seated in and hurried over to William, placing a hand on his shoulder and turning him to face her. Her breath caught in her throat when she saw the tears running freely down his face. "Oh William," she exclaimed, drawing him to her in a crushing hug. "We can't change the past, no matter how much we might want to, but we do have a say in our present and in our future." She pulled away from William, holding him less than an arm's length away from her and looked up into his eyes, trying to stress how important what she was telling him was to them. "We are both here now, we are aware of each other's circumstances. We can go on from here, release the past and build on our future, wherever it may lead us."
"No matter what happens in the days and weeks to come," William stated. "I never want us to lose contact with each other again. I want you to stay a part of my life in whatever capacity you feel comfortable with, whether it be an acquaintance, a friend, or something more." William looked at Naomi with hope in his eyes, almost pleading with her not to disappear from his life again.
"I promise you, William." Naomi responded more to the pleading look in his eyes, than to the words he was saying. "I won't disappear from your life. Whatever relationship we end up having, I don't want you out of my life anymore than you want me out of yours."
They reached for each other and shared a warm hug. They stayed like that for a few minutes, finding comfort and even healing in each other's presence. Finally, they released each other, wiping tears from each other's faces.
"If only people could see me now with tears streaming down my face, they'd never believe it was me." William managed a wane smile.
"I don't believe that for a moment William," Naomi returned the smile with more enthusiasm. "You were never afraid to express your feelings and emotions to me all those years ago."
William looked deep into her eyes, seeing all the love he saw in those same eyes years before reflected back at him.
"Oh, Naomi," he began, shaking his head. "You were the only person I could ever truly express any feelings to. You were the only person to whom I could tell what I was feeling, the only one I could let see me cry, the only person I could let see me be vulnerable or afraid." He took a breath and continued. "You were the only person I could be myself with and not feel like I had to put on a show or put up a front for."
They were quiet for a few moments, then Naomi spoke up, "I'm glad that you were able to do that with me. It makes me feel like we really did have something special".
"That we did, Naomi. We most definitely did have something special."
William collected himself, taking a deep breath to put himself back together. "My housekeeper, Sally, has the day off, but I'm sure I can find something in that kitchen to fix for lunch." He gave her a smile. "And if I can't, we can always eat out."
Naomi laughed heartily at that and entwined her arm with William's. "Let's see what we can find in your fridge first, shall we."
A huge grin spread across William's face as he lead Naomi from the living room to the kitchen. He felt something inside that he hadn't felt in years. It was hope, and a belief that he had a chance for happiness in his life, all because of this wonderful and extraordinary woman at his side.
Mitchell and the rest of the Spades put their plan into motion at 10:00 pm.
Roan hooked his computer up to the bank's line and hacked into the security cameras. After a short time he had the cameras on a 15 minute time loop that would make it around three times, giving them 45 minutes free from the security cameras. They hoped that that was enough time, at lease they estimated that it would be.
Once that was done, Matthew met them at the rear entrance to the bank and let them in. Roan immediately went to the computer station and hooked up to the bank mainframe, starting their own program.
Mitchell headed towards the back vault which held the printing plates while Jason headed downstairs to the second vault to retrieve the printing paper. As they approached the corridors leading to their perspective vaults, they listened in on their headsets for the OK from Roan that the pressure sensitive floor tiles had been turned off. It was only supposed to take five minutes, but ended up taking Roan 13 minutes to get the job done. Finally the floor sensors were off and Mitchell and Jason headed for the vaults.
It also turned out harder than they thought to get the vaults open. It was supposed to take 10 minutes but it took Jason 15 minutes and Mitchell 19 minutes.
Roan started to panic because now they only had about 10 minutes to get the job done and out of there.
Jason was just coming up from the basement with the printing paper and Mitchell was exiting the vault with the printing plates when all hell broke loose...
Jim and Blair had just left the movie theatre after viewing the latest flick starring Al Pacino. They were going over the contrasts in movie-cops compared with real-life cops when they got a call of a silent alarm at the Cascade Savings and Loans that was only three blocks away. Immediately Jim called in giving their position and stating that they were two minutes away. Blair slapped the light on the dash board of the truck and they sped two blocks, turning the light and siren off when they were one block away.
Jim pulled into the side alley next to the Savings and Loans and parked.
"OK, Chief," Jim began. "I want you to stay..." he never got any further when Blair laughed at him.
"Jim, I'm trained for this stuff now, I don't have to stay in the truck. I can help you." Blair gave him a sincere look. "You need me partner. I'm your backup."
Jim thought about that for just a moment then came to a decision. "Chief, first of all, you are IN training for this stuff. You're training is not complete."
"Semantics, man," Blair returned. "I've been at these kind of scenes for four years now, Jim. You can trust me to back you up now."
Jim winced at the words. He wished he had never said that phrase in the bullpen a year ago during the Alex Barnes fiasco. Saying 'I need a partner I can trust' that fateful day was one of the worst choices he had ever made in his life and he deeply regretted it everyday since then. He looked over at his partner. Blair was looking at him with determination in his eyes. Jim knew he wasn't going to win this one.
"OK, Chief." Jim relented. "But I want you to stay close, and take this." Jim reached into his glove compartment and took out his backup revolver, handing it over to Blair.
Blair took the gun with only a trace of hesitation and quickly checked it to see if it was loaded and then checked the safety. It shocked Jim to see his peace loving guide handle a gun so comfortably.
"Alright, Jim." Blair glanced over at his stunned partner. "Let's go."
The partners crept over to the side door and paused there. Blair automatically placed a hand on Jim's back and guided him to filter through the surrounding sounds and listen to see how many were inside.
"Four heartbeats, Chief," Jim stated as he focused on the perp's locations. "One is almost next to this door, the second one is almost in the middle of the bank, the third is towards the back where the vault is and the fourth..." Jim paused as he tried to distinguish where exactly the fourth heartbeat was coming from. It was underneath the bank. "The fourth one is in the basement, Chief."
Blair was about to suggest something when Jim held up his hand. "The one by the door." Jim paused as he focused his hearing on the man just feet away from them. "His heartrate is speeding up." Jim paused for a moment then turned to Blair and whispered, "He's heading away from the door, come on."
Jim carefully pulled on the handle, but it wouldn't move. Blair looked at the almost hidden keypad on the right hand side of the door.
"Come here, Jim." Blair pointed to the keypad. "This must unlock the door."
"That doesn't help us much when we don't know the combination, Chief," Jim chided his partner.
"Smartass," Blair stated. "Put your fingers over the keypad and use your sense of touch to punch in the combination."
Jim looked at Blair like he had finally lost his mind. Blair breathed out in exasperation.
"Jim, think man," Blair chastised him. "With keypads, you usually exert different amounts of pressure on the different numbers in the code. People generally put the most pressure on the last digit, the second most pressure on the first digit, third most on the third digit and least amount of pressure on the second digit." Blair looked up at Jim's face as the realization dawned in the big man's expression.
"Let's give your theory a try, Darwin," Jim responded. This could work as long as there weren't more than four or five digits in the code. He ran his fingertips over the keypad. "It feels like there are six numbers that are more worn out that the others, Chief."
"Ok, Jim," Blair quickly replied. "That must mean that there's six numbers in the code. Lets go through which numbers have what amount of pressure usually pressed upon them. It only took the Sentinel and Guide less than one minute to get the proper code punched in and the lock mechanism released. At this point they had been there for less than four minutes and by the responses he heard when he answered the call of the alarm, their closest backup would be there in less than five minutes.
Jim eased the door open and listened for anyone hiding near the other side of it. When he found the corridor to be clear, he stepped inside and motioned Blair to follow behind him. They crept along the hallway towards the main area of the bank where the man that was stationed next to the door they entered was whispering to another man whose heartbeat was increasing steadily. Jim tilted his head and stretched out his hearing to listen to what the perps were saying. He immediately felt Blair's hand on his back, grounding him so that he could freely use his senses.
"I don't like this Roan," the first guy confessed. "It's taking a lot longer than it was supposed to. I thought we only had 45 minutes before the camera loop ended."
"We do," the second guy, Roan, replied. "Don't worry Matthew, Mitchell has it covered." The second voice didn't sound as confident as his statement professed.
"I'd still feel a whole lot better if we could get out of here, like NOW!" the first voice proclaimed.
"It won't be long now," the second voice responded. "Relax, buddy, everything will be OK. You'll see."
Jim turned back toward his partner and whispered to him, "There are two of them in the main area just beyond this corner." Blair looked over towards the corner in question, then turned back toward his Sentinel.
"OK, partner," Blair whispered. "What's your plan?"
Jim turned back towards the interior of the bank for a moment then quickly turned back to look behind him at his partner.
"Shit," Jim exclaimed. "He's coming back and there's nowhere to take cover."
Jim and Blair pressed themselves against the wall on the corner that the perp would walk around in just a moment. It was fortunate for them that the perp was distracted as he came around the corner muttering something about 'it's just taking too damn long'. Jim reached out and wrapped one arm around the young man and placed his other hand over the man's mouth. He quickly repositioned his arms to that of a sleeper hold and in just a few seconds, the young man's body became slack in his arms. Jim lowered the man to the floor and laid him against the wall.
"One down, three more to go," Blair stated with a grin.
Jim had to laugh at his partner's enthusiasm. How much did he miss having this man beside him everyday on the job. He couldn't wait until Blair was finished with the Academy and was Jim's official partner. He would always be by his side then and no one could threaten to have his 'credentials pulled' anymore.
The two of them just started around the corner when a loud siren blared throughout the bank.
Jim clutched his hands to his ears, unable to block out the extremely loud sound piercing through his skull. Blair was immediately next to his Sentinel to offer his help when he heard shouting behind him. Blair placed his hand on Jim's shoulder, hoping the contact would give Jim something to focus on and therefore aid him in lowering the dial on his enhanced hearing. Blair glanced behind him as the shouts grew louder, giving the alarm a run for it's money.
"I didn't do anything, man," one of the perps shouted. "Freddy set us up, man. He made us think we had more time than we did."
It was at that moment that one of the perps caught sight of Blair and pulled out a gun.
Blair grabbed his partner and pushed him around the corner as gunfire erupted towards him. Blair grunted in pain as they slammed into the wall just around the corner. His first thought was for his partner and when he looked at Jim's face, he realized he was in a zone-out. Another thing he noticed was the pain in his arm where the bullet had hit.
"Shit." Blair noted his injury but forced himself to ignore it and focus on the more pressing problem.
"Come on partner, you have to come back to me now. I need your help buddy."
Blair heard frantic footsteps heading toward their position. They must be heading toward the side door, Blair thought as he hauled his practically catatonic partner towards the door. There was nowhere to take cover, and with Jim in this condition, they were sitting ducks. Blair's first instinct was to get his Sentinel out of there ASAP. They reached the door just as the perps rounded the corner. Without time to think about what lay outside, Blair pushed his partner out the door and rushed out behind him.
As soon as he stepped into the alley, Blair heard the reving of an engine and turned around to find a van barrelling down on them. Blair only had a second to think and in that second he launched himself at his partner, pushing him out of the way of the speeding van. The van's brakes squealed as it slammed into Blair, who rolled up over the front then off the driver's side to crash onto the pavement. His body rolled a few times before coming to a stop against the wall of the building on the opposite sid